★★★★★ 5
Audiobook conveys message even better than author’s eloquent, precise words in a book
Format: Audiobook, Format: Audiobook
Target audience: non-narcissistic people who have been adversely impacted by pathologically narcissistic individuals.
“It’s Not You” is one of those books where the audiobook *greatly* enhances, optimizes & completes the reader’s understanding of the author’s message & information. Read-by-the-author audiobooks have the advantage of having emphases & nuances conveyed as the author intended. And this author verbal communication is highly nuanced & expressive.
Ramani Durvasula not only has the credentials, depth of experience & cohesive understanding of pathologies of the human psyche, especially Axis II conditions, she has the rare combination of experience & competency to diagnose & treat both:
1) a) pathological individuals w/narcissistic thought & behavior patterns &/or b) NPD patients meeting diagnostic criteria (“treat” includes attenuate, not necessarily “cure”, esp conditions w/ poor prognosis)
2) those adversely impacted by the damage inflicted on people in the pathological individual’s lives.
At the risk of being repetitive, this book is aimed at the 2nd population.
In online spaces, Durvasula has been criticized by the 1st population, which is to be expected. Combating, destroying ANY *perceived* criticism is an *expected* part of narcissistic pathology (as well as avoidantly attached individuals, many of whom are also narcissistic).
This book is an excellent companion to the solid, publicly accessible online via her videos (free) as well as the modestly priced online healing program. Finding good resources to help those affected by the pathological narcissist is an incredibly challenging task. Rare are the “counselors”, “therapists” & other resources who can truly help make genuine, sustainable substantial headway on the task of recovering from adverse impacts inflicted by pathological narcissists.
Ramani Durvasula’s resources are the opposite - practically makes up for wasted time & resources “auditioning” ineffective therapists, reading books, attending group therapies etc.
While my personal tool kit for recovery is evolving (as is the science), Durvasula’s material, including “It’s Not You” is a permanent part of my tool kit.
As of Nov 2024, additional & complementary resources I’ve found helpful:
- “It’s Not You” is a well complemented by: Peter Solerno’s Aug 2024 The Nature and Nurture of Narcissism: Understanding Narcissistic Personality Disorder from the Perspective of Gene - Environment Interaction, a book I purchased for the citations/bibliography & have been delightfully surprised by the writing. . . Solerno & Durvasula are stylistic different in their delivery. I sincerely appreciate both.
- Work & online material of Les Carter.
- Jackson MacKenzie’s books RIP
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Reviewed in the United States on December 1, 2024
